My Poor Babe
It all started about ten days ago. I noticed this rash on Ben's front. I thought not too much of it and treated it like a normal rash with creme and baby powder. After a while I saw that it was not getting better. In fact, it looked like it was getting worse! I contacted my aunt Christy to see if she could help (she is a nurse). I gave her the symptoms and she came back with the conclusion that Ben had Thrush! He is in alot of pain and it breaks my heart that this is happening to him :(
For those who do not know what Thrush is, it is a fungal bacterial that occurs either on the bottom or mouth. It thrives on moisture and heat. Living in Hawaii where its hot and humid is becoming a problem right now..... It also feed on baby powder, which is why it was getting worse!...my bad.
I had no idea what this was so I looked it up and found home remedies that I could try. It said that Tea Tree was a really could treatment. Luckily I had some face tea tree creme in my cabinet! So I just slathered that on and it's seeming to work fine. I had a friend from mommy playgroup give my some tea tree oil and coconut oil mixed. This will be my first day of real treatments so wish us luck!
Another good remedy is to let him sit in warm water and baking soda.
Ben really enjoyed this little treatment!
I will keep every one posted on how he is doing.
Also in other news......I need to vent. Hopefully writing down my feelings will make me feel better...
I dread going sleep. I dread it because I know that it will not be a good one and I will be very grumpy and short tempered. Ben is STILL waking up 2 times in the night!!!
Let me walk through his schedules....
He wakes up around 7 every morning.
He eats every 3 hours. 3 baby food meals a day and 2 snack bottles. I am also trying to stretch in between feedings so he can go longer without feeding.
He takes 2-3 naps a day. 1 in the morning for about 1-1.5 hrs and 1 in the afternoon for 1-2 hrs. And sometimes he takes a 1/2 hour nap at 6.
He goes to bed between 8-9pm
He will wake up at 11:30 and then again at 4:30. I give him a bottle both times. The 4:30 wakeup is the most difficult. It is really hard for him to go back to sleep lately. This may be due to his Thrush so im trying not to get too upset over that. But even without the thrush he will still wake up twice a night.
He takes his naps just fine! He will fuss a little bit and I go back in and put his soother back in his mouth, pat him on the back and he will be out! It's pretty great.
He has also become more fussy and needy lately. Just another thing to make be frustrated.....I try just letting him scream out his little tantrums in his playpen.
I am the kind of person who NEEDS her sleep. And I am NOT exaggerating when I say need. Sometimes I get so angry that I will just scream and swear and say things I don't mean. I think to myself...how did I get stuck with the baby that never sleeps through the night! I hate it. I hate it soooo much. And I hate when Im like this, but reality is that I straight up turn into a monster when Im not rested.....so im basically a monster the majority of the time.
I CANNOT even imagine having another kid until this one starts sleeping. I don't think I could do it. Sometimes i think 1 kid is enough and that I never want to go through this again. Because it's just so hard...... on everyone. So if things don't start changing....I don't think we will be starting baby #2 for a long long time...It's really sad that they won't be close in age. But I think having a happy mom is more important.
Some of you may know this already...but...I did, and still do, suffer from post partum depression. For a really long time after Ben was born, I was miserable. I was getting 5 hours of interrupted sleep a night, he was and is still a fussy baby, I had the breast feeding problems...etc etc. It was all too much. Having Ben in our lives has been both amazing and awful. I know that sounds horrible. And I totally love my son and he does bring so much joy to my life and he is seriously the cutest little baby ever, but it's just been very hard being a mom. I see other moms and how much they love it and that their child has brought so much love and happiness to their lives. And I want that. I want everything to be full of love, happiness, patience, and laughter. I didn't want to have kids for years, so I feel like I was forced into a role that I was just not ready for.
So Ive decided that tonight's the night....it's the night I am going to let Ben cry all night long. I will do it for as long as it takes. It's time for change. Call me cruel....but it is necessary.